To better serve our browsing public, here are some answers to the most infrequently asked questions. Amazingly, the answers are almost identical to those responding to our most frequently asked questions, which indicates perhaps the universe is a lot simpler than we were all giving it credit for.
Q: What time of year is it?
A: Oh, you know, the usual for this time of year.
Q: Would you like cheese with that?
A: Yes, dripping with cheese.
Q: Is there a temporal rift just outside of Jupiter's orbit?
A: Yes, dripping with cheese.
Q: Can this rift be sewn up with an inverse tachyon pulse?
A: I'd tell you, but then I'd be ruining Dan Brown's next novel.
Q: When will you be running naked through my front yard?
A: When you least expect it.
Q: What rhymes with shift course, where can the bicuspids be found, and how does one greet an alien from the planet Snarblak?
A: Gift horse. Mouth. Hello?!?
Q: Why has it been rather itchy lately?
A: That's between you, your doctor, your partner, and now everyone with a computer.
Q: If a tree falls in the forest, and no one is around to hear it, will it still flatten a squirrel?
A: Is that an African or a European swallow?
Q: Ooo-hay the uck-fay comes up with these estions-quay?
A: Oh for Pete's sake, Julius, nobody speaks Pig-Latin anymore.
Q: Will this IAQ list ever be updated?
A: No, dripping with cheese.
